Increasing Home Safety

We're living in dangerous times. After the events of September 11, 2001, America and Americans will never be the same, though we must still work, pay the mortgage, and educate our children.

Experts agree that part of overcoming the paralysis often caused by fear is to take steps to feel as if you're helping to participate in a solution. Taking steps for your own safety is very empowering and can start right in your home.

Each family should organize their ideas and safety measures into categories. The categories will differ from family to family, but an example might be:

• Securing our home
• Dealing with visitors in our house
• Dealing with adults other than parents
• Emergencies

Have a family meeting and discuss the various safety issues your family faces or may face. Organize thoughts into sections and discuss ideas and possible solutions. You can even role play a situation, such as having your child be approached for a ride by an adult she doesn’t know, or by pretending that the phone is ringing when only your children are home.

Once you have your categories, you might organize them like this.

Securing the Home
Talk about answering the phone and taking messages. If your child is home alone, for instance, suggest that all calls get screened through an answering machine before your child picks up the phone.

Locking up: Instruct your family how to lock all doors and windows and to set an alarm system if you have one. Discuss how much more protection a deadbolt will provide over a locked door knob alone.

Keys: Who has them? Who can use them? Where are they hidden? Should you ever tell your friends where they're hidden? Should a key be hidden where others on the street can see you get it?

Mail: Do you want your kids to open their mail before you are home? Or should it all wait? If you have a post office box, then you can be the one to pick it up. Otherwise, should they bring it in? Where should they put it? Should they open it or not? What about parcels?

Dealing with Visitors in the House
As frightening as it sounds, the home is one of the more common places for a child to be taken advantage of. Tell your kids that, no matter what another person threatens or says, that they must always come to you if something has happened to them that makes them uncomfortable, and that they will not be punished for telling what has happened. This applies to everyone -- family friends, an uncle you've always adored -- everyone.

Strangers and smooth talkers: Your child should know never to open the door for strangers -- salespeople, members of a church, anyone. Only you should make that decision. Even neighbors should be off limits for kids who are home alone, and especially other kids, as trouble can easily start or lawsuits occur when children are playing unattended in your home.

Visitors and bedrooms: Visitors, whatever age, should only be allowed into a child's bedroom if you have invited them. This gives your child some measure of defense if they feel someone is trying to get into her bedroom.

Dealing With Adults Other Than Parents
Because your child spends a lot of time around other children, you should teach your child how to treat adults, especially adults she doesn’t know.

Teachers, coaches, youth leaders and other adults in positions of authority: Just because an adult is in a position of authority does not give them the right to act in any way that makes your child uncomfortable. Tell your kids that, regardless of the adult's job title, they should always come and talk to you about occurrences that they've found strange or troubling.

Appropriate vs. inappropriate touching from adults: Talk about bad touches and good touches, and tell them that if they are ever touched by someone in a way that makes them feel bad, or if that person touches your child and wants her to keep a secret, your child should tell you right away.

Emergencies
Do you have a fire plan? How fast can your whole family get out of the house, even out the windows, and to a predetermined meeting place? Time your family. Have monthly drills and give your family rewards for breaking records. Discuss the behavior of fires, where the best air is (close to the ground), and how to get out even if you cannot see. Check the batteries in your smoke alarms two times per year, such as every time there is a time change. Ask for family suggestions as to better fire safety around the house.

Family password: If you were to be in an accident, and had to send a non-family member to pick upyour child, how would your child know that the emergency was for real? How could she tell the difference between someone trying to abduct her and someone really trying to get her to you? A family password is one way to do this safely. This is a password known only by the family and not passed around to friends. If a non-family member comes to pick your child up and they know the password, then the child can go with them. Change the password after each use.

When to call: What is an emergency and whom do you call in case of one? What are the penalties for calling 9-1-1 as a prank? Discuss the various issues surrounding finding and getting help in the event of an emergency.